Phaedra

Name: Phaedra
Player: Sam Vold
Race: Syndar (Silver skinned)
Class: Cleric

Day One
This one begins her apprenticeship tomorrow. She understands that she is to be his first student. Good news has reached This One’s ears about his ability as a teacher and she looks forward to meeting him. Alestear, may the gods watch over you.

Day Two
This One’s mentor is one known as Alestear. He has a kind heart. This One believes he will teach her well.

Day Three
Traveling with Alestear and the group has been interesting. As we traveled, Alestear went over the basics of what we would be doing in each village and what was to be expected. This One knew there were a lot of expectations, but she didn’t quite expect this many. Though This One has always enjoyed the daily ceremonies and Alestear says that’s where she can start, with leading them. We reached the first village today and Alestear took This One to meet with the magistrate. Tomorrow we start about our duties.

Day Four
Alestear showed This One her basic duties in each town today. We led a prayer to Lunara this evening to officiate the start of the harvesting season. This One learned that we don’t always settle disputes as much as we offer suggestions to dispel the tension. It was over a land dispute that This One learned you work a lot with the magistrate. The magistrate in this town is Magister Arowen. He is kindly Syndar and listens eagerly to advice given by Alestear. This One admires Alestear’s prowess and hope she one days achieves it.

Day Five
Today This One attended a joining ceremony with Alestear to give her blessing. It was a very joyous occasion and This One was glad she had the experience of it. She didn’t quite understand the joy of finding a life partner until today, when she saw it in the couple’s eyes. This One wishes them the best throughout their long lives. We will be moving on to our next town soon. This One looks forward to the new experiences to come.

Day Six
We stayed in Risoul one day longer, at the behest of Magister Arowen. Alestear led This One and the others around town on a relaxing day of shopping. Our supplies were replenished, though we didn’t need many. This One enjoyed interacting with the townspeople. They were all so very kind. A young Syndar girl eagerly asked This One if she could braid some flowers into This One’s hair. She graciously accepted and was sure to wear them all day. She hopes the townspeople in the next stop are just as kind.

Day Seven
We arrived in Faywerth this afternoon and Magister Rowjak offered to house us during our stay. He is a portly old Syndar, but has a very kind face. He treats us with much respect and treated us to a grand dinner this evening. This One looks forward to being his guest.

Day Eight
Alestear asked This One to officiate today’s duties. This One was so nervous, she didn’t feel she was ready. But as she went through them, they weren’t as intimidating as they first were. It was another prayer to Lunara for the harvest season. This One prays to Lunara frequently and found it an easy task to ask Her blessing on the harvest. The most difficult task was sitting in on a trial for a thief. This One wasn’t sure how to pass judgment, but Alestear was there to help her when needed. She is grateful to have him as a teacher. She believes he is teaching her well.

Day Nine
A lot of humans have been passing through the area and causing trouble, giving This One and Alestear a few more trials to sit in on today. Again, he let me take the lead. This One felt more confident today and didn’t need as much assistance from Alestear. She is pleased she’s getting this experience, though she kind of wishes it was for happier things. She would be excited to preside over a joining ceremony again. Perhaps in due time…

Day Ten
Today was another day of settling disputes. Alestear has been letting This One take the lead a lot. He tells her at the end of the day, or during the disputes that she’s doing well. She appreciates his encouragement and guidance. He has exceeded her expectations as a teacher. He pushes her to do her best and she looks forward to many new experiences with him.

Day Twenty
Alestear keeps much from This One, not always letting her know of the despair that plagues our continent. But This One has heard. She understands we may be losing this war. But This One will not give up hope. The gods will see us through. They watch over us all.

Day Thirty
Today was a day full of despair and hopelessness. A group of survivors found our town today. Many were wounded, some beyond help. This One did the best she could to help them make it through. Hope still remains for This One and she shared it with the others. Alestear helped tend the wounded and provided them with food and water. Some will be taking shelter with us tonight.

Day Thirty-One
We lost a human child today. This One is told his name was Iain, he was just eight years of age. This One will attend his funeral tomorrow. He lost to a fever. The sickness spread quickly, too quickly for This One to be able to save him. Alestear says he will accompany This One. It will be a comfort to have him with.

Day Thirty-Two
The funeral was short, Iain buried in the small cemetery on the west end of the town. This One said a blessing for him and his family. She wishes the best for them through this hard time. Alestear laid flowers upon his gravesite. The family will stay with us tonight and we shall honor his memory.

Day Thirty-Three
This One woke up with Iain’s younger sister, Emilia, in her bed. This One didn’t even notice her join last night. She is such a sweet, innocent child of only six years. It’s a shame she has to live through such tragedy. Her older brother is gone. She’s seen too much tragedy for a lifetime already, and yet it will only continue to get worse. This One will say many prayers for this child. May she have a healthy life full of peace and love. And may the gods watch over her.

Day Thirty-Four
Iain’s family left us today to find their own temporary residence. His parents thanked us graciously for allowing them to stay with us. It was an honor to have them with us. This One is bound to help those who need it. Emilia was in tears, for her brother, and for leaving. She presented This One with some flowers she had picked around the village. This One will always remember Emilia, Iain, and their family. May the gods watch over them all.

Day Thirty-Five
Today was another day of tending to the injured and ill. This One can’t imagine the devastation in other villages. How many lives have been lost already? This One can’t bear to think of it. Alestear handled a few conflicts today, but brought This One lunch and told her to rest. He does take good care of her. This One is grateful.

Day Thirty-Six
Today, Emilia came running to the area where This One was tending to the injured and ill. She was in tears, saying her father was ill. This One took her hand and let her lead the way. Her father was only mildly ill. This One was able to provide care with a simple remedy. Emilia danced around This One thanking her profusely for saving her papa. Her mother asked This One to stay for dinner and she obliged. She has taken a liking to this human family.

Day Thirty-Seven
Alestear told This One of a situation he came across yesterday, but didn’t give her many details. He said it wasn’t really something she needed to know about and that he handled it himself. This One is a little worried, he seemed extremely weary of his task. Though there seemed to be some pride in his eyes as well. Perhaps it wasn’t as bad as she thinks, though she wishes he would share more with her. Alestear, let This One help…

Day Thirty-Eight
Alestear told This One that the Penitent are potentially only a few days away from us, though they seem to be moving away. She will pray they keep moving away. The gods will keep us safe, she knows. Emilia came to visit again today as well. She asked This One to walk with her and we played in a field for a little while this afternoon. It brings joy to This One to see her innocence, not having to know what’s going on in the world around her. She wishes the best for this young one. And she will always hold Emilia in her heart.

Day Thirty-Nine
Today was another day of attending to the sick and wounded. Emilia followed along, bringing a smile to each patient’s face as she acted as her helper. This One enjoys having her along and is grateful her parents trust her with This One. Alestear told This One he has matters to attend to tomorrow afternoon, but he doesn’t want This One involved. She wishes she could help, but she understands. It is likely a matter that isn’t at her ability to handle yet. She will take Emilia on again and continue to her duties attending to those that still need it. She finds comfort in attending to the sick and wounded, seeing them get better. Every loss is another tragedy, but she understands the gods need to reclaim them. But This One will save as many as she can.

Day Forty
Today, This One saw fear in Alestear’s eyes. It was only a flash, but it was there. We were evacuated today, the Penitent will be upon us soon. This One must keep her group safe. And This One must not show fear. For Alestear, This One will not be afraid.

Day Forty-One
We left another village this morning. Tonight we’re hiding in a small abandoned cottage. The villagers have been scattered. This One prays for them all, especially young Emilia and her family. The Penitent are not far behind, This One heard. And what of the Undead? This One has only heard rumors of them, hopefully she will never encounter one. Fear is starting to creep into This One’s heart. She will not let it show though. She must not let Alestear know she is afraid. Stay strong for the group and for him.

Day One Hundred Seven
This One says many prayers to the gods every day. She prays they will see us through this increasingly impossible time. Villages upon villages flee to the new continent, seeking refuge. This One wonders if it’s not the safest option, but Alestear insists the gods will protect us. And This One believes him.

Day One Hundred Sixty
Each day brings more despair. Today we came upon a village that had been attacked seemingly a few days before. Corpses littered the streets, torn mercilessly apart by their attackers. This One does not understand what they did to deserve this cruel fate, especially the children. The group said a prayer for the lost souls, but there was no time to give them a proper funeral, much to This One’s despair.

Day Two Hundred Ten
This One keeps the group moving. Alestear insists we continue to the coast, perhaps we’ll find some respite. This One isn’t so sure. Pain, suffering, and hopelessness covers the continent like a choking fog. For every intact village, five have been destroyed. The gods will watch over us though. This One knows. She still feels their pull. They have not left us.

Day Three Hundred
We managed to find some peace among the chaos today. This One and Alestear walked along the coast as Solar and Lunara changed places. This One offered her silent prayers as we sat and watched the waves roll in. After a while, Alestear told This One a little about his time with his teachers out in the field. He also expressed a few fears he had had about taking on an apprentice. This One assured him she believes he’s been a wonderful teacher. She worries about leaving him to work with someone else, but she knows it will happen as Alestear takes on another apprentice or leaves the field. This One is grateful she got to work with him.
Day Three Hundred Sixty-One
Alestear insists we leave behind our lives on this continent, there is nothing for us here any longer. We will flee to the new continent and attempt to rebuild. Today we start searching for passage.

Day Three Hundred Sixty-Seven
We found passage across to the new continent. Alestear and This One will be staying in a cabin, the captain is Syndar himself and still shows us respect. Alestear fell silent today. This One is worried. She can see the pain in his eyes, though he tries to hide it. This One will let him rest, perhaps that is all that is needed. Faedrun, you were so kind to us, even up until the end. Thank you for your support, but the gods have forsaken you. This One knows they will lead us to a better life on the new continent.

Day Three Hundred Sixty-Eight
Today marks our first full day at sea. Alestear has not said a word since we boarded. His eyes are vacant and he barely acknowledges when This One speaks to him. He would not accept any food either. Perhaps the seas do not work well with him. The captain says that is not uncommon. Some more rest may do him well. This One will take care of him and let him rest. Solar, Lunara, please watch over him.

Day Three Hundred Sixty-Nine
Second day at sea. Alestear still won’t speak. He just lays in bed, not acknowledging the world. This One does not believe it is simply sea sickness. There is something more. Alestear, please, speak to her. Let This One help. She promises she will take care of you. This One will never give up.

Day Three Hundred Seventy
The group has asked when they will see Alestear. This One told them he is simply ill. The sea does not sit well with him, it’s simply sea sickness. But This One knows that is not true. This One knows we are beginning to lose him. But she won’t give up. She will not let him be lost. He will come back to us…to This One. Please…Alestear.

Day Three Hundred Seventy-One
This One managed to get Alestear to eat something today. It was very little, but it was something. Even the slightest acknowledgement, the slightest action, gives This One hope. He’s still in there. He can come back to us…to This One.

Day Three Hundred Seventy-Two
Noemi asked to see Alestear today. She wanted to ask his blessing on this journey. This One had to deny access to her. This One will not let them see him like this. She will continue to pass it off as sea sickness. She will be the only one with access to see Alestear until he is well again. Surely this won’t last long. Alestear…the gods will bring you back to us…to This One.

Day Three Hundred Seventy-Three
This One left Alestear alone for a brief time, though it pained her inside. The captain asked for a blessing on his ship, on this voyage. How could This One deny? It is her duty, and the captain has been so kind to us. When This One returned to the cabin, Alestear’s state had not changed. It seemed he hadn’t even moved. This One is worried, she will leave him as little as possible and the others will not see him. Alestear…you can’t give up…please…

Day Three Hundred Seventy-Four
No changes today. We are still at sea, the captain saying the voyage will take us about six months. This One prays the gods will give Alestear back to her in that time. He eats very little, but he’s with us…with her…physically for now. Otherwise, he’s lost in his thoughts. Alestear…let This One help…she can serve as some relief to you…please…

Day Three Hundred Seventy-Five
One week at sea. The voyage has been slow and painful thus far. This One doesn’t believe it’s going to get any better. Alestear sinks deeper into despair with each passing moment and there is nothing This One can do for him. The group only asks passing questions now, and doesn’t bother to ask to see him. They know This One will deny them that access. Alestear…we need you…

Day Three Hundred Eighty-Two
It has been a week since This One has written. She saw it as a pointless endeavor as nothing has changed. It is the same thing day after day. We leave our old lives behind us on Faedrun and approach our new ones on the new continent. Alestear remains lost to us and This One clings to little hope. This One will do what she can to bring him back to her, but she’s beginning to lose herself too…

Day Three Hundred Eighty-Eight
This One will not let herself be lost. A part of her may be lost, but she will not be lost like Alestear. She must remain strong for him. She must remain by his side under any and every circumstance. He will come back to us…to her. This One believes he will…knows he will….she knows it in her heart.

Day Three Hundred Ninety-Two
This One grew desperate and asked Alestear to attempt to write today. She quickly learned it’s a pointless endeavor. His writings are nothing but pain. He didn’t write long, looked at her with blank eyes and handed over the journal and quill, rolled onto his side and refused to move the rest of the day. This One thought it would help him, she was clearly wrong. She will not ask this of him again.

Day Three Hundred Ninety-Eight
Today This One writes after having endured a brutal storm. A few crew members were lost to the torrent, she understands. She remained safe in the cabin with Alestear, though he never understood the situation. The rest of the group remained safe below decks. This One is thankful for their safety. Tomorrow she will lead a prayer for those we lost and for thanking the gods for the rest of the crew’s safety…and a silent prayer will be added for Alestear’s return…

Day Three Hundred Ninety-Nine
This One led morning prayers for those that were lost to us in the storm and also to thank the gods for the safety of those remaining onboard. She kept it brief, as she is weary of this journey already. Watching over Alestear has drained her, though it takes little energy. She says a prayer for him every night to Lunara when She is strongest, though it has made no difference. This One is sick with worry, but she will not give up hope. Alestear…you will come back to her…

Day Four Hundred Four
He will come back. He will come back. He will come back. He will come back. This One knows it.

Day Four Hundred Twenty
This One seems to be losing it again. She has not written in a few weeks. She has barely left the cabin. She remains by Alestear’s side, refusing to move and refusing company. Food is brought to us by the captain, as he is the only one allowed access to the cabin. He doesn’t question This One, he slips in and out quietly, leaving This One in peace. She is grateful for that. He is a kindly Syndar. Alestear will come back. He will come back. He will come back. He will come back.

Day Four Hundred Thirty
Sleep. Alestear. Pray. Alestear. Eat. Alestear. Sea. Alestear. Rocking. Alestear. Nothing. Alestear. Sleep. Alestear. Pray. Alestear. Eat. Alestear. This One knows he will come back. He will. This One will remain as strong as she can. Though she seems to be failing on the inside. Alestear…don’t leave her alone…

Day Four Hundred Forty-Two
This One has been falling asleep sitting by Alestear’s bed. He barely looks at her, barely acknowledges her, but she remains. He stares at the ceiling but she sits dutifully by his bedside, refusing to move. She often wakes up on the floor next to his bed, stiff and sore, but pleased at having refused to move from his side, even as she slept. She refuses to be gone in case he needs her, in case he wakes up. She will not miss the moment of him coming back to her.

Day Four Hundred Forty-Five
They finally got This One to leave the cabin. She walked around deck for a few hours, though Alestear remained on her mind. She longed to get back to him, though she knew his condition would be unchanged. But what if he did wake up? What if he needed her and she wasn’t there? Theobold kept her out though, even when she attempted to return to the cabin. This One believes it did her some good. She is thinking clearer than before. She sees all is not lost.

Day Four Hundred Fifty-Two
This One led a prayer this morning at the behest of the captain. We still have about three months at sea, and the captain requested a prayer for the last leg of our journey. This One obliged, though it pained her to leave Alestear. Her heart longs to remain with him, though she knows he’s lost to her. But he needs her…he will come back to her. If only she just remains by his side and prays enough. He will return to her…

Day Four Hundred Sixty
This One has been reading Alestear’s journal to him, to remind him of who he is. But she has seen the despair toward the end of his writing. It pains her to read his words. And to know she was important enough for him to carry on as far as the ship, but not to keep him out of his misery, out of his despair? This One cannot bear the thought. She would give anything to switch places with him. She will be his strength when he needs it, even in his state. This One will bring him back to her…somehow.

Day Four Hundred Seventy-Five
The group leaves This One in peace when she leaves the cabin. They do not question her about Alestear nor do they question her about herself. She is grateful for that. She cannot bear to see the pain she has caused them, for she knows she has. But This One will regain her strength. This One will remain strong for the group. For him. She will show them the leader that she is and carry them with her. She must remain strong for them. She will keep face and play the role she was born to. They look to her and she will be there for them.

Day Four Hundred Eighty-Four
Avery approached This One today while she was meandering about the deck. He asked after Alestear and herself and offered assistance if any could be given. This One declined his offer knowing nothing could be done for either of them. But she is grateful he asked. She will reconnect with the group and lead a prayer each morning and evening for the rest of the trip. She will remain by Alestear’s side as much as she can, but she must play her proper role. She has not done so this voyage so far. But she will show them she’s strong and can be relied upon once the new continent is reached.

Day Four Hundred Ninety-Six
The prayers have been going well. This One often sneaks out of the cabin and up onto the deck when she knows the group has gone to sleep to say her silent prayers to Lunara alone. They have not brought him back yet, but she refuses to give up hope. Alestear is her strength and she is his. This One will not let him be lost until the end of his days. She will fight for him with every passing day.

Day Five Hundred
Alestear refused food today. This is the second day he’s done so. This One is beginning to worry more than normal. Alestear, have you hit an ultimate low? This One is doing the best she can. She will remain by your side until you begin eating again. She apologizes for ever having left you. Please…Alestear…don’t be giving up. Don’t leave her alone…

Day Five Hundred Two
Alestear once again ate today. This One remained by his side all day, without fail. Avery led the prayers in her stead the past few days. She is thankful he took her role. With Alestear eating, perhaps she can return to her duties, though it will always pain her to leave him behind. She knows the group is beginning to suspect more than seasickness, but they don’t question it. This One fears the day she has to explain, if she has to.

Day Five Hundred Eleven
Not much has changed, as is normal for the past several months. This One has continued to lead her morning prayers and the group remains with her. She has thus far saved face with them and they look up to her again. This One is grateful it was easy to regain their favor. Though she only ever longs to stay by Alestear’s side. She knows his state is unchanged. She knows it always will be. But she can’t ignore the thought of him awakening from his depression and she’s not immediately there for him. What if he needs her? This One must remain by his side, to help him through, to bring him back.

Day Five Hundred Twenty
The captain estimates we have about a month left. This One is anxious to see land again. To walk among trees and through fields with the sun shining brightly above her, Alestear by her side, like it used to be. Alestear teaching her new things about the world, about what it means to be a Celestine, what it means to be a leader. This One has looked up to him, has adored his smile, cherished every bit of wisdom he has shared with her. Perhaps This One has even loved him. Yes. She believes she has. That is why it pains her so much to see him like this, to know he’s lost to her. But This One will repress it and think no longer on it. He is her mentor and nothing more.

Day Five Hundred Twenty-Five
A few of the passengers have fallen ill. The captain believes some of the food may have spoiled, causing the sickness. This One visited them to see what she could do, though she feels weak. The voyage has taken its toll on her too, but with the assistance of Avery and Noemi, we were able to tend to those who were ill. They should recover well, but This One will add an extra prayer for them until they are well again.

Day Five Hundred Forty-Seven
Today we finally landed. After six months at sea, This One wasn’t sure she’d see land again. The colony is known as New Aldoria. We will rest here to regain our strength, and hopefully Alestear will return to us while we rest. It was difficult to get him off the ship once we docked. Alestear wouldn’t acknowledge This One and it took several times for him to understand where we were and the need to get off the ship. This One is worried he will be lost forever.

Day Five Hundred Forty-Eight
We found temporary lodging at an inn today. We will be staying here at least a week probably. Alestear is still unresponsive. This One told the group he just needs some time to recover from the sea sickness, though they thought it would have left him by now. This One fears she will have to tell them the truth…Alestear, please…come back to This One…to us…

Day Five Hundred Forty-Nine
This One was forced to explain to the group Alestear’s situation. She had lied to them during the journey here because she did not want them to know. She was ashamed and selfish. This One wanted him to remain the strength for the group, he always was. She could not let them see him this way. But now they know. They know he’s lost to us. Lost in a depression. Despair now hangs around the group like a cloud of gnats. We will move forward though. This One will keep the group going.

Day Five Hundred Fifty
The Old Ways don’t apply on this new continent. This One understands that. Formalities are lost on everyone here. It’s such an odd habit, but This One understands there is no need for it. She will begin to drop it. Alestear is lost to us. He’s lost to me. There is nothing that can be done. He barely eats, he’s given up his journal. I’ve taken to reading it. He’s given up, but This One will not let him die, no matter what the cost. This One will ensure he survives.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-One
Everyone is doing their best to care for Alestear, but This One can sense the despair among them. How are we to carry on if our leader can’t? They recognized me as a temporary leader while on the ship, but they’re truly Alestear’s entourage. And if we lost Alestear, who’s to say This One won’t be lost too? She won’t be though. She promised to remain strong for him and she will.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Two
Today was a small victory. We got Alestear outside to walk around. He walked mostly on his own, but would reach out for reassurance occasionally. This One stayed by his side and while we were not out long, she considers it a step forward. Alestear…are you coming back to us? To me? Some hope has returned to my heart.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Three
What hope was returned yesterday was quickly taken away. Alestear returned to his normal state, eyes staring blankly and unresponsive. He wouldn’t even eat today. I tried talking to him, but I don’t believe he heard me. Why would you give us false hope Alestear? Please…just come back to us…to me.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Four
This One ventured out today. Yvonne was left to watch Alestear. He remained unresponsive, as is usual. But This One learned of another Celestine in the Newhope Colony, Celestial Arragones. Perhaps if she can be reached, she can help us, provide us with shelter. Surely she’ll have respect for her own kind. Tomorrow preparations will begin to move on from New Aldoria. I told Alestear of this plan, but he didn’t acknowledge me…Alestear…I will keep you safe. I promise.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Five
Noemi was lost to us today. I found her swinging from a tree. This One cannot bear to see her beautiful face so pale. Tomorrow her mana will be returned to the Life Stream. This One senses it, even on this continent. Alestear had no reaction when I told him. I do not let him see the tears. I don’t let anyone see the pain. I must remain strong for them…for him.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Six
Today Noemi’s mana was returned to the life stream. This One led a shortened version of the ceremony, but she was treated with honor nonetheless. They would not let us bury her in town, so she is within the surrounding forest by a beautiful oak tree. Alestear was not in attendance, he wouldn’t move. I’m not sure he understood what I told him. The tears will be hidden for his sake. Alestear…our family grows thinner and you fail to acknowledge.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Seven
Arguments broke out in the group today. This One entered one herself. They wanted to leave Alestear behind. Force someone else to take care of him, let him be someone else’s burden. No. That will never happen. Alestear will remain with us. It doesn’t matter if it slows us down. I promised to ensure he survives and I will do so. He will return to us…to me. I know it. Alestear…please.

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Eight
Avery asked to speak privately with This One today. He informed me he would be taking a small group including Amelie, Tristan, Thierry, and Delphine. They were leaving our family to make their own way. After the arguments yesterday they came to the conclusion that I was just as lost as Alestear, that I had grown desperate. I do not hold it against them for leaving. This One understands. She will let them leave in peace and hide the tears. Alestear will not know the reason for their departure. Perhaps they are right though. I have grown desperate. He’s been lost to us over six months now. He doesn’t seem as though he’ll come back. We may as well give up. No…I refuse. He’s in there somewhere. He will come back. Alestear…

Day Five Hundred Fifty-Nine
Our family grew thinner yet again yesterday, but the plans carry on. Supplies were gathered today and tomorrow the final preparations will be made. The day after tomorrow we will set out for Newhope. Hopefully Celestial Arragones will have it in her heart to help us. Alestear…I’m sorry to uproot you, but I promised to keep you safe and I believe this move will help keep us all safe.

Day Five Hundred Sixty
Our final supplies were packed today. I told Alestear of the plan, as I have every day, but once again he didn’t acknowledge. We will figure out a way to move him. He will not be left behind. Tomorrow a new chapter in our lives begins. This One prays it will go well.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-One
Alestear understood I needed him to move, to leave with me. He walked along blankly staring at everything, but as long as I remained at his side, he kept up with us. We stopped for lunch and one other rest, though decent progress was made. Theobold is keeping the fire going while Alestear rests in the tent. Though he isn’t much company, I worry to leave his side. Alestear…I believe you will come back to me. Please don’t let that be a false belief.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Two
Alestear gave up on us today and camp had to be made earlier than expected. Yvonne scouted ahead and found a large enough clearing for us. She’s been a great help with everything that’s been going on, as has the rest of the group. Sadness follows us, our family seems smaller with each passing day. But we carry on. I am exhausted, but it will not show. I will remain strong for the group…for him.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Three
Tragedy struck us today. Veronique was lost to us. Yvonne found her in the forest, a stab wound to her chest, the dagger in her hand. By the time she was found, her body was cold and her eyes vacant. She is the second death our family has had to endure. Tomorrow a small funeral will be held, but we must leave her behind. Alestear remained silent when I told him, as was expected. He only ever looks at This One with vacant eyes. Perhaps he will be the next one lost to us…

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Four
Veronique was laid to rest this morning underneath a lovely aging oak tree. Prayers were said and blessings were given, though we didn’t remain long afterwards. This One told the group we must continue to move on, to move forward.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Five
Today was another day of travel, only we are now one person less. Alestear seemed to understand that, but still didn’t acknowledge it. He is still lost to us no matter how hard I try. When camp is set up, he immediately enters the tent and lays down to sleep. At least, that’s what I believe, though he doesn’t actually sleep. He stares blankly at the roof of the tent. Alestear…please…I know you’re in there…I’m trying to stay strong for you…to have courage too…I’m here for you Alestear…please, just let me help you…

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Six
Alestear gave up on us today. We stopped for a break and couldn’t get him to move any more. Camp was set up in a nearby clearing and we moved Alestear to the tent at least. We will rest here for a day, or however long it takes, to recover our strength. We’re almost there, Alestear. Please don’t completely give up. I will keep you safe. I promise.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Seven
Every passing day it gets worse. He’s lost to me. To us. We didn’t break camp today to continue our journey, he couldn’t be moved. Theobold felled a stag, providing us with the best meal we’d had in weeks. Alestear ate, after a little convincing. It doesn’t seem that he understands he needs to carry on, for our group….for me. This has been the only family This One has known. To lose any member would be impossible to handle. We’ve lost too many already. Tomorrow we break camp and continue on whether he wants to or not. Some hope still remains in This One’s heart.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Eight
By Yvonne’s estimation we’re only about a half day’s travel from the Newhope colony. Yvonne will leave tomorrow to look for a place for us to settle. Alestear…we will have a more permanent residence soon. I promise.

Day Five Hundred Sixty-Nine
Alestear didn’t move today, we couldn’t get him to. Yvonne set out early for the colony, saying she’d return in a few days’ time to help us get Alestear the rest of the way. That will give Alestear more time to rest and recover. This One is a little frustrated knowing we’re so close to a more suitable home for Alestear, but she will not push him. It’s hard, she knows. It’s hard on her too.

Day Five Hundred Seventy
Again, Alestear didn’t move today. Theobold scouted out the area and reported there was nothing of major significance in the area. We should be safe a little longer. Yvonne should return upon the morrow, and the day after we will set out. Alestear, you’re going to need to be strong for me. Please. We’re almost there and I promise you won’t have to move any more after that. We’ll keep you safe. I’ll keep you safe.

Day Five Hundred Seventy-One
Yvonne returned at mid-day. She said she found an inn to take us in for a while at a fair price. The owner is a Syndar as well and still holds much respect for the old ways. When told it was two Celestine looking for a place to stay, he eagerly agreed to have us stay. Tomorrow we will pack up and make our way to the colony. Alestear, please, it’s not far. I promise we’ll have you in as permanent a home as possible soon.

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Two
The innkeeper is a kindly elder Syndar. He gave us the nicest rooms he could which was the kindest gesture we’ve gotten since arriving on the new continent. Alestear collapsed on his bed right away and wouldn’t move the rest of the day. He didn’t even eat, which seemed to be normal based off our travels. Whenever we made camp, he wouldn’t eat that night. This One will try again in the morning. Alestear, we’ve done all of this for you. Don’t give up on us now. Don’t give up on me. Please.

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Three
After extensively speaking with the innkeeper today, I learned that Celestial Arragones can be difficult to get ahold of. It’s my goal though, I believe she can offer us help and we can offer her help to some degree. Tomorrow the search for her estates will begin. This One will get her attention and offer assistance. This One will keep Alestear safe and she believes Celestial Arragones will be able to help. Maybe she can even bring Alestear back to me…

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Four
Yvonne said she found odd jobs for her and Theobold to do to earn us some extra bits of income. Thank the gods we have her. We wouldn’t have made it this far without her. She stays with Alestear when I cannot. Though it seems his care will be mostly left to me with the others working. That’s okay. The information I need can be gathered here and Yvonne and Theobold will gather what they can as well. I prefer to stay by Alestear’s side, though I know he’d be safe. But I want to be there when he comes back to us. This One believes it will happen soon…please, Alestear…

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Five
Theobold delivered a letter to Celestial Arragones’ assistants today, stating our name and purpose in the area. Hopefully we’ll receive a response saying she’d be willing to work with us. This One will say a few prayers this evening when Lunara reigns. She watches over us, even here. Though she’s taken Alestear from me, I know she’ll give him back. Alestear…you’re not completely lost to us. I know you aren’t…

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Six
Alestear acknowledged me when I spoke to him today. I informed him of what’s been going on since we’ve arrived in Newhope. There seemed to be recognition in his eyes as well, as if he indeed did know who I am. That look hasn’t been in his eyes since the day we lost him. Alestear, are you coming back to us? To me?

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Seven
His response vaguely continued today. The recognition was still in his eyes and small acknowledgements were made. Alestear ate more than normal today. Are you actually coming back to me, Alestear? Please…come back to me…I know it will be slow and take patience…but I need you, Alestear. You’ve given me false hope once before. Please don’t do that to me again, please tell me you’re coming back…

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Eight
Alestear’s eyes were blank again today. What return he made was quickly snuffed out. Alestear…please. Come back to me…stay with me…you can’t leave me alone on this continent any longer. I need you. We need you…

Day Five Hundred Seventy-Nine
The recognition returned to his eyes for a brief moment today. This One will say a prayer again tonight. Alestear…please…just come back to me…I need you…No word has yet been received in response to my letter to Celestial Arragones. Alestear…I promised you I would keep you safe, but I’ve run out of ideas. Please…we need you to survive this…This One may not last much longer without you…

Day Five Hundred Eighty
The gods gave him back today. This One always had hope he would return to us…to her. He told me he’ll be strong for me. And he’s sorry for what happened. It doesn’t matter. He’s back. Alestear. I’ve missed you. But you’re back. The group will be rejuvenated, hope will blossom again. My heart can rest now. No. My heart will never rest. But it will be able to seek peace again. Alestear has come back to me.